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  • Lily LaBeau

Extra Sensitive Whore

Being extra sensitive isn’t the easiest thing. Being a sex worker who is extra sensitive is especially challenging. Here are my top quick tips for staying happy and sane.


1) Be careful of giving away too much of your energy. It can be towards thoughts, people, or circumstances. If you’re over thinking, you’re hemorrhaging energy. When I start feeling overwhelmed, nothing sounds good, I’m not wanting to work, I’m irritable, that’s when it’s time for self care. Sadly, you shouldn’t have to get to this state every time! A daily self care practice can make it so the ups and downs of life feel far less drastic. I’m really working on a weekly self care practice (I’m at more emergency state) and then I can set a goal of daily self care.


2) I believe in building my spiritual life organically; be in tune with messages from nature. My spirit animal for this year was a sloth to remind me that I need to take things easy as they come and slow down! While walking in the forest a while ago I almost stepped on an albino snail. That was another moment for me that felt like the universe saying, keep going but be aware, relax and find your rhythm. Some other animal messengers I’ve had this year are bumble bees flying into my house in spring, deers eating on the trail during my morning walk, and beautiful honey colored bears appearing in my dreams. Not every animal feels like a message some just stand out and I think, “Google it, just check.” Each animal brings a different meaning and purpose.


3) Crystals are so beautiful and I feel completely like a goddess when I adorn myself in natural stones. I hide them in my purse and decorate my house with them. I love crystals! However, I am not very knowledgeable about them and I want to learn more in the future. What I discovered is better for me is something I can feel in the body. Breathing exercises are life. Also visualizations really do the trick for me when I’m in emergency mode. And there’s nothing like some good ol’ fashioned water therapy. Float tanks, spa day, a bath at the house, jumping in the lake in the summer, there’s nothing like submerging your body in the elixir of life! Salt conducts energy and it used for soothing muscles, it’s also great for clearing your body of stagnant energy. Add some baking soda and essential oils in there and you have the added benefit of anti-radiation and total relaxation!


4) Learn more about who you are! The purpose of this blog is not about teaching as much as it is about sharing. We are all different people from different backgrounds with different gifts and challenges. The Internet is a wealth of knowledge, use it wisely! Be discerning of course, and use the knowledge you have, but also trust your intuition with what’s right for you. Questions will pop up out of know where, that’s your intuition sending you a message. There are so many ways to build your intuition but first it’s about trusting yourself. You know what’s best for your body, mind, and spirit.


5) Because we are highly sensitive we can be some of the deepest and erotic sex witches, or we can be anxiety riddled trauma victims flinching at the softest touch. That’s the gift and curse. Doing sex work at a young age (18) had its benefits in that I didn’t have much shame around sex. I was completely open and non judgmental towards the things I was doing and I am thankful for that, I was always so honest in my interactions on camera. But slowly you take on negative energy and if you don't stop and reconnect with our body, that's a recipe for burnout. And most of us girls and guys will experience burnout multiple times in our careers.


And so that brings me to my final thought on ways I maintain balance in my life as an extra sensitive person and sex worker. There is nothing more important than your personal physical and mental health. There is no cost too great for maintaining equilibrium. And the most efficient bang for your buck is to seek a professional. Any professional, it could be a counselor, a nutritionist, one of those Facebook programs you see and think, they’re listening. I’ve done so many programs, seen so many counselors, and I’m thankful because each and every one brought me more clarity on who I am. Take the free intro class, go to a community support group, however your budget allows you to do it... the key is find places where you can feel safe to learn and grow as a person with people you respect and admire. We need social time but we need to feel safe. Find where you are comfortable, and join the world because when we get into overwhelm we hide, and we are here for a reason. We are meant to be this sensitive. Trust in yourself and the world by creating positive situations. One teacher told me, make it so you can win. You decide how you work best so why not set up events in your life you know you can win at?

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